Answers for Parents

This page is educational and not a substitute for medical or legal advice.

Parenting in today’s drug landscape can feel overwhelming. Substances are stronger, more accessible, and often more unpredictable than maybe what you were used to. This page is designed to give you clear, honest, evidence-based information so you can talk with your children confidently, compassionately, and effectively. Below is a list of top 10 pressing questions that, as both a parent and user, I believe are likely to come up. They’re also the kinds of conversations that when approached with openness, care, and honesty can build trust, reduce harm, and ultimately contribute to a healthier, more understanding world.

1) How do I talk to my kids about drugs?

Talking to your children about drugs should not be a single, serious “big talk,” but rather an ongoing conversation that evolves as they grow. Start early, stay curious, and focus on listening as much as speaking. Ask open-ended questions like, “What are you hearing at school?” or “What do you think about vaping or cannabis?” The goal is not to lecture, but to understand their world.

Try to remain calm, even if you feel worried. Your reaction will determine whether they come back to you in the future. Avoid exaggeration or scare tactics — young people are quick to dismiss information that feels unrealistic. (A long aside: When I was in the 10th grade, the adults opted for this unfortunate and lazy method. Instead of creating a sense of intimacy and safety, with personal conversations in smaller groups where questions and curiosities about drug use were encouraged (and gasp, perhaps some discomfort felt!) the adults chose to “talk” “to” us “about” drugs by inviting a former drug user to talk (and promote) his biography, The Agony of Ecstasy. He stood in front of hundreds of teenagers and told us that he experimented with several drugs and after brief moments of fun, his drug use turned into addiction, dealing, and stealing, and soon landed him in jail. What I recall the most from that two hour ‘scared straight’ tacit was… that ecstasy and LSD sounded ah-maaaazing. Not that I should stay away from drugs, or that I too, would go to jail, undoubtedly the message the adults in the room were hoping for. More importantly, I remember thinking about everything we’d been told about ‘risky behavious and decisions’ and started to question it. I had tried weed a few times with no negative outcomes—but wasn’t smoking weed supposed to be a guaranteed path to bad behaviour and addiction? What else were adults lying to us? Could we trust them?)

An aside to the aside: It feels strangely fitting that my first memory of learning about drugs was that school assembly, given that I went on to become a drug researcher.

My point is: offer honest, age-appropriate information and make it clear that your primary concern is their safety and wellbeing, not punishment or unreasonable worry. When your child feels heard rather than judged, they are far more likely to be open with you.

2) What is harm reduction and why am I hearing about it?

Harm reduction (often called HR) is an approach to drug education and public health that focuses on keeping people safe and reducing risks. It starts from a simple reality: some young people will experiment with substances. Rather than ignoring that possibility, harm reduction provides honest information and practical ways to reduce harm.

This can include things like drug-checking services that identify dangerous contaminants, education about safer choices, overdose prevention tools, and making sure people know how to get help quickly if something goes wrong. These strategies are designed to prevent the most serious harms, like overdose, poisoning, or unsafe situations.

A common misconception is that harm reduction encourages drug use. In fact, the goal is the opposite: to protect health and save lives. Research shows that harm reduction approaches can reduce overdose deaths, prevent infections, and help people access healthcare and support.

For parents, harm reduction can also be helpful because it encourages open, realistic conversations about drugs. Instead of relying only on “just say no,” it focuses on helping young people understand risks, make informed decisions, and know how to stay safer if they ever encounter substances.

3) If I think my child might be using drugs, what should I look out for?

Instead of looking for “warning signs,” which can sometimes be misleading or simply normal parts of adolescence, it can be more helpful to notice changes in your child’s behaviour or wellbeing and use those moments as opportunities to check in and talk. Context is important. Sudden secrecy, mood swings, irritability, withdrawal from family activities, loss of interest in hobbies, or unexplained risk-taking behavior may warrant attention.

If you notice patterns that concern you, approach your child with curiosity rather than accusation. Express what you’ve observed and ask open questions. “I’ve noticed you seem more withdrawn lately — is something going on?” keeps the door open in ways that “Are you using drugs?” often does not.

4) How has the drug landscape changed since I was a youth?

Today’s drug market is very different from previous generations. Substances are stronger, more potent, and more accessible than ever — for example, cannabis often contains much higher levels of THC. Some lab-made drugs, called new psychoactive substances (NPS), are designed to mimic cannabis, MDMA, cocaine, or LSD, but their chemical makeup can change frequently, making them unpredictable. Social media and online marketplaces further increase exposure and normalize use. Understanding these changes and the associated risks is why drug literacy is increasingly important for both parents and young people.

5) What should I know about the Netherland’s drug policy?

Dutch drug policy can be confusing, but here’s the essentials. It’s based on the Opium Act, which separates substances into two categories:

• Schedule I (“hard drugs”) – heroin, cocaine, amphetamines, ecstasy, and GHB, considered high-risk to health.
• Schedule II (“soft drugs”) – cannabis, hashish, and some sedatives, seen as less harmful (although some very intelligent people have publicly contested that line of thinking)

Technically, possession, sale, and production of all drugs are illegal. In practice, the Netherlands applies a policy of toleration (gedoogbeleid): small amounts for personal use are usually not prosecuted (up to 5 g of cannabis, 0.5 g of cocaine, or one ecstasy pill). These limits are practical guidelines, not certainly not formal legal rights, and enforcement can vary.

Overall, the Dutch system is pragmatic and harm reduction–oriented, prioritizing public health, education, and access to support. Services like drug checking and low-threshold care focus on reducing risks rather than punishing users.

6) Drug testing services? Tell me more.

Drug testing is a (still underused) privilege and a potentially life-saving service, carried out by non-judgmental, knowledgeable, and approachable staff. The government supports drug checking because it helps protect public health by identifying dangerous substances and issuing timely warnings, for example through the Red Alert app. It also flags high-risk pills and monitors trends—such as increasing MDMA strength—so people can make more informed decisions. More details and specific guidelines about testing can be found here.

Many parents worry that these conversations might feel uncomfortable or confronting—but in reality, they’re often very straightforward. To give you a sense of how approachable and professional this space is, I once took my boss along with me to do fieldwork at one of the city’s drug testing services with some of my own drugs. If I can sit next to the person who deems me to be responsible enough to pay me while answering questions like “When did you last use this batch of pills? What were the side effects? Do you know who you got it from?” you, brave reader, can do this alongside your responsible child.

7) What is a good drug policy?

A good drug policy prioritizes health, safety, and evidence over punishment and stigma. It provides access to accurate information, prevention, treatment, and support services.

Effective policies focus on reducing harm, protecting young people, and addressing the underlying social and mental health factors that influence substance use. They recognize that fear and punishment alone do not prevent use — but education, connection, and accessible care can reduce risk and improve outcomes.

8) How can I support my child in making good choices?

Strong, trusting relationships are one of the most protective factors against harmful substance use. Open communication, clear boundaries, and consistent expectations help create a sense of safety and stability. Being honest about your own experiences—without glorifying them—can build trust and credibility, especially when you focus on what you learned and what you might do differently.

You can also help them build decision-making skills. Talk through hypothetical scenarios. Discuss peer pressure and ways to say no. Encourage healthy outlets for stress and risk-taking, such as sports, or creative pursuits. Teach them to think critically rather than simply follow a rule.

When young people feel listened to, supported, and not immediately judged, they are far more likely to come to you when it matters most.

9) My child is going to a festival for the first time. What should I know?

Wonderful news! These are incredibly rich spaces where people are exposed to so much newness: new ways of community, connection, and of course new music styles and clothing and personal expression. All in all, a great landscape for youth to explore themselves and the world.

However, there are certainly risks that you and your child should familiarize yourself with. Questions to ask, for example: does my child know how to get home as a plan B? Does the site take card and cash? Do they have warm clothes for the trip home? (Beginners mistake; it gets COLD once you break off from the pack!) What is the drug policy of the venue? (likely no tolerance but good to check). Is there a care team/space that they can go to if they or a friend is having a hard time? What if they need the help of EHBO/first aid responders or security? What are they allowed and not allowed to bring into the festival? (Once, a stone-faced security guard informed me that the whole brick of banana bread that I was saving for future Hayley’s health and happiness post-festival would not be allowed on site. Luckily, the new friends behind me were happy to reap my prepping benefits).

You might also consider talking about staying with trusted friends, keeping phones charged, and looking out for one another. If substance use might come up, creating space for open, non-judgmental conversation beforehand can make a real difference in how your child navigates those situations. Ultimately, the goal isn’t to eliminate all risk—that’s not realistic—but to help your child feel prepared, supported, and able to make safer decisions.

10) Where can I get accurate and non-judgemental information on safer drug use?

Look for evidence-based, non-sensational sources. Public health organizations, youth mental health services, and harm reduction groups often provide clear, practical information for parents. Seeking information and support is not a sign of failure — it is a sign of responsible parenting.

Below are some links to some resources I know, trust, and use myself and recommend to others, from the local to global scale.

DrugsLab: Educational YouTube channel demonstrating drug effects and safe practices.

Poppi: Experimental museum initiative exploring drugs through art and discussion.

Jellenik: Reliable information on alcohol and drugs, including risks and self-tests.

Unity: Peer-led guidance on nightlife, alcohol, and drugs in the Netherlands.

Drug Science: UK non-profit providing evidence-based drug research and policy guidance.

Erowid: Global library of user reports and expert resources promoting responsible drug use.

Harm Reduction International: All things harm reduction.

Do you have a specific question not listed here? I’d be happy to think about it, please feel welcome to get in touch.